dharmabumgrl's Diaryland Diary
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meet me in outerspace
a few months ago I gave my mother my diary address.
She has read over 300 pages that I have written in the last 4 years...
then stopped communicating with me..
I wrote the following..........TODAY
"what happened? Mom, you read what I wrote and stopped talking to me...
No christmas, or NY or anything. You read something I wrote and became distant...
as if you thought my past life would bring more glorious moments.
no unfortunately, when you have my life, you grasp those happy moments which are far and few between.
There you go, and here i come. hardest time of my life, I'm 32, you know what its like to be 32 right?, I am no longer as slim as I was at twenty-ANYTHING.. and I feel like no one understands me, and I beg for my parents approval.. you've been there I know but you've got a life-time of denial to swim through...
what did you read that spooked you?
You know that I love you and my dad, but I don't know why i'm 32 and still confused.. I probably never will understand all this grown up disfunctional shit.....
Tomorrow, I''ll wake up and be afraid to check my email.. the fear being that you answer me angrily.. I can't handle anger.
xo, your astranged daughter......................Tawnya"m
1:32 a.m. - January 05, 2006
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